9
Three cheers if you’re working through that detrimental scarcity mindset !!!
In this solo episode, Kelly tells us about her magic candle - the tarot card it held and the messages of this card. She dives deep into the assignment the tarot card gave her - discovering her why! As she dives in, she takes us through her upbringing around money and the scarcity mindset she is trying to overcome.
She also talks about:
Resources:
Biddy Tarot
Manifesting Money Podcast
Find the full episode transcription here
Suicide Prevention Lifeline: call 988 to be connected with a trained professional
Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 to connect with a crisis counselor
Follow us on:
TikTok:
@nooffenseand
instagram:
@nooffenseand_podcast
@kelly.haze
@amustardshower
Email: nooffenseand@gmail.com
Send us your feedback here
Subscribe to our email list here
We acknowledge we are operating on the occupied land of the Ute, Arapahoe, and Cheyenne peoples colonized as Denver - we pay our respects to those past, present, and future. We also acknowledge this statement is not enough and are committed to giving a portion of our proceeds to the people whose land we occupy and are in the process of getting a true land reverence.
9
Three cheers if you’re working through that detrimental scarcity mindset !!!
In this solo episode, Kelly tells us about her magic candle - the tarot card it held and the messages of this card. She dives deep into the assignment the tarot card gave her - discovering her why! As she dives in, she takes us through her upbringing around money and the scarcity mindset she is trying to overcome.
She also talks about:
Resources:
Biddy Tarot
Manifesting Money Podcast
Find the full episode transcription here
Suicide Prevention Lifeline: call 988 to be connected with a trained professional
Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 to connect with a crisis counselor
Follow us on:
TikTok:
@nooffenseand
instagram:
@nooffenseand_podcast
@kelly.haze
@amustardshower
Email: nooffenseand@gmail.com
Send us your feedback here
Subscribe to our email list here
We acknowledge we are operating on the occupied land of the Ute, Arapahoe, and Cheyenne peoples colonized as Denver - we pay our respects to those past, present, and future. We also acknowledge this statement is not enough and are committed to giving a portion of our proceeds to the people whose land we occupy and are in the process of getting a true land reverence.
Kendle: Hey, y'all. You're listening to no Offense and a loving and nourishing space created to fuel conversations around personal and collective liberation. We're Kelly Kendle, having vulnerable and intentional conversations full of humor, empathy, and, of course, love.
Kelly: Honestly, these episodes are just our opinions. So take no offense and we invite you to explore yourself through our words, help grow our community by leaving a review and most importantly, sharing. Now, let's get into some self-loving.
Kelly:
Oh, my goodness. I can't believe it. This is going to be my second solo episode. Maybe the first one, depending on when you actually get to hear it and when we launch these. But this is my second time recording my solo episode. Kenny and I are separated. This week. I am in Mexico celebrating my honeymoon anniversary with my amazing husband of one year. Just sitting here recording a podcast, looking him outside, looking so fine, looking at this beautiful scenery in Mexico. Oh, my goodness, it's gorgeous here. And the food, oh, my God, the food at this resort is so good. Shout out secrets. Marmoa beach. Literally the best hotel or resort we've ever stayed in. It's so relaxing. It's so bougie. It's just so fetched. I watched me and Girls the other day and she is in California for a wedding. And here I am recording my second episode. So when Kenny and I met up last week, I ended up burning through a magic candle that I got from Cosmic Tea. And it had a crystal in it. And at the bottom of the candle, it had a tarot card necklace. And I've had that thing since February. It's now July. And last week we finally burned through it and it had the Magician card in there. It came when Kenny and I were podcasting that day. And I'm just going to read it to you because it's going to set up this whole thing. And you can hear what the Magician card is for because it was perfect. It was amazing. So the key words when you see the card upright, which I'm going to interpret this as upright, is manifestation, resourcefulness, power, inspired action. The Magician card is numbered one the number of new beginnings and opportunities and associates with the planet of Mercury. He stands with one arm stretched upwards towards the universe and the other pointing down to the earth. His positioning represents his connection between the spiritual realms and the material realms. The Magician uses this relationship to create and manifest his goals to the physical realm. He has all of the tarot suits, a cup, pentacle, sword, and wand. Each symbolizing one of the four elements water, earth, air, and fire. It is also a sign that he has all the tools and elements he needs to manifest his intentions into being. As a master manifestor, the Magician brings you the tools, resources, and energy you need to make your dreams come true. Seriously, everything you need right now is at your fingertips. You have the spiritual fire, physical earth, mental air and emotional water resources to manifest your desires. And when you combine them with the energy of the spiritual and earthly realms, you will become a manifestation powerhouse. The key is to bring these tools together synergistically, so that the impact of what you create is greater than the separate parts. This is alchemy at its best. Now it's the perfect time to move forward to an idea that you recently conceived. The seed of potential has sprouted and you are being called to take action and bring your intention to fruition. The skills, knowledge and capabilities you have gathered along your path have led you to where you are now. And whether or not you know it, you are already ready to turn your ideas into reality. In your quest to manifest your goals, you must establish a clear vision of what you will create and why before you act. It is not enough to be motivated by ego like money, status or fame. You need to have a sole connection to your goals and intentions. You are a powerful, creative being, and this is your opportunity to bring your higher self in alignment with your day to day actions to create the future you want most. When you are clear about your why and your why, the Magician calls on you to take inspired action. You will need focused attention and intense concentration to bring your goals to fruition. Focus on the one thing that will move you towards your goal. Commitment to the task is essential, so drop any distractions. You may draw your focus away from what you want to achieve. Be methodological in your planning and make sure you stay on track and carry out your tasks. Okay? I'm sorry. If anyone gets that card. That's literally the most amazing card ever. When we got it that week, we were so excited. At least I was. I was so excited I could not even believe that that was the cart that I pulled from this candle that I had forever ago and just never burnt through. It was not that big of a candle. Just when we're starting this podcast, the day that Kenny and I are recording the podcast in my bathtub, when we're lighting the candle, I get this card. It's just like everything to me. So what's important though, about the card absolutely, is the task at hand is really figuring out that why. So our little assignment was for me to work on that, so I can see what is my why. And I sat on it trying to think of it. I think as we were working through why we were doing this podcast. Though. I've worked through this a lot already for a while and with Kenny. And that's why we're perfect for doing this together. Because we're just so aligned. And especially aligned in those things that are so important for the collective. Like love and compassion and empathy and being raw and vulnerable and sharing stories and information to help everybody be better for themselves. Be better for their families. Be better for the collective. You know. Be better for others. And also. Most importantly. Be better for yourself. And so I thought I would sit on that for a while. I definitely wanted to record that while I was here in Mexico. I mean, free distractions, stress free, just living my best life, not going to lie. And so I sat with it yesterday. Well, I sat with it for several days, but yesterday I was like, okay, I'm going to sit. I'm going to write about it. I'm going to put pen to paper. And of course, I had to pull a tarot card to help a girl out. I'm trying to dig deep, and I just need some inspiration sometimes to be able to figure out what I really want to write about, or at least it helps give me something to guide my thoughts. And so I was pulling the cards while I was on the beach, and I definitely called to Michael, St. Michael, just for protection and love and wisdom, watching over me, watching over my husband, especially while we're here on this trip. And as I was shuffling the cards and I was thinking about my intention and kind of clearing my mind, it said that I was meant to inspire others through being my authentic self, getting to teach others to live a more fulfilled life, a life they truly desire and dream about, teach wisdom. It's so crazy because right after that, I pulled the High Priestess. Talk about that, about my one year kind of metamorphosis from last year to this year on that episode. But I pulled the card, the five of pentacles, and it pulled up reversed and pulled up reversed. It says that it kind of comes from, like, recovery from financial loss, spiritual poverty, which was so jarring. When I read that yesterday, I was like, oh, my gosh, if I do not feel guilty right now of some spiritual poverty, that's how I feel like I've been living for the last year. That car pulled up, and usually pentacles again, I'm kind of learning through the tarot process right now. Pentacles has more so to do with business, finance, money, those types of things. So for this one to get pulled and then it was also pulled and reversed, basically, the card has two men out there. One looks injured. They both look very poor. They look like they're struggling. The card basically shows, like, they're so focused on their current situation that they can't even see the church lit above them, which was a symbol for, like, hope, faith, and spiritual support. So they had help right in front of their faces, but they just didn't know how to take it because they were so stuck in their current sorrow, which is also so symbolic, I guess, of like last year for me, really a while, I should say. It also says that the card is an end of difficult financial times. Starting to feel life is worth living again and regaining self confidence. The card can illuminate the persistence of inner spiritual poverty. You may have felt isolated, alone, sometimes is missing. Like my purpose may be placed too much emphasis on wealth and neglected spiritual well being. And just so you guys know, as I'm learning to go through the Tarot card, learning how to pull Tarot cards, I have been using a website called Biddy Biddy and it gives me the most amazing descriptions on what each of the cards mean and what they mean in reverse. I've also been doing some reading. A friend of mine got me a book about reading Tarot. And then I have been also watching some YouTube channels ish about it. Definitely knowing like the history, how to pull, what to do while you're pulling. That's what she said, the cards. Yeah. So just some resources. But Biddy has been like monumental health help. So every time I'm kind of pulling cards, that's what I'm referencing. If you guys want to check it out, I definitely would. No gatekeeping here. And so when I read that obviously part of my wife's money. Like, let's be real money. It is what it is right now. And if you don't have money, it's very hard to do certain things, especially things that I really want to do in life. So I definitely did a deep dive into kind of where that goes. And I'll talk about that exercise at the end of this. I'll also be doing a self care Monday episode on how to do the exercise. It's basically this little tool that you can use to try and help find your way. In conjunction with me pulling the Tarot card, it's been really helpful and some of the breathing exercises and just connecting with myself and really diving deep. But money is a big thing. That's just a piece of my why I can't help that. I grew up not with a lot of money and we have a family that we need to support. We're talking about having our own family. We like to do things like travel. But most importantly, also I want to be able to give more and give back more and have more financial freedom to have time so I can give back to communities and really be not only impactful with money, but also impactful because that money has bought me this time to really dive in and help others and be in community.
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Kendle: Hello there! We hope that you all are enjoying this episode and that it is bringing you everything you were seeking. We are coming to you today in this moment to ask, do you have a business? Do you want some advertising? If so, we would love to link up with you. We love collaborating, we love connecting, we love sharing the work that you are doing in this world. And we would be so honored to halt space in our episodes to tell people about your business. So if this feels aligned for you, please reach out to us, slide into the DM, send us an email, whatever works for you. We also accept carrier pigeons. We cannot wait to hear from you, and we hope that you enjoy the rest of this episode. Much love, y'all.
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Kelly: And I want to dive into kind of just my upbringing around money, just so you can better understand, because it is a part of my why, and this is why it's part of my why is my relationship with money has been really poor. Just because I constantly lived a life of fight or flight, and a number of things go into that. But when I'm speaking more so to the financial side of what living through that was like was being bullied all the time, especially in middle school, that's when it was probably the absolute worst. I even got bullied in high school, too, because girls were just mean to me, like legit. And I'm really not a mean person. Just because I look like a bitch doesn't mean I'm actually a bitch. And just because you're projecting those thoughts on me doesn't make me that. When you're in middle school and high school, that's not how I was thinking. Looking back now, now I understand why I was getting bullied, but it hurts when you're little, and I was bullied a lot, and I always felt like I was bullied for having less. And because I grew up poor, I didn't have all of these different things that everyone else had. And maybe it was just my way of justifying why they were bullying on me. I just associated it with not having enough. So, I mean, I have to work through that, I guess, but it's just that scarcity mindset and learning in my household because we didn't have money, that money was a scarce resource, that it wasn't something that came and went. It was always something that just kind of, like, left and you never got back. And now that I'm changing those mindsets around, there shifting everything for me, obviously, on the finance side of stuff, but also just mentality wise as a whole. But one thing growing up poor, shout out to people that have to go through a little bit of struggle because you become super resourceful. And one thing that my dad had always taught me was if you want something, you have to work for it. If you want something, you have to go get it yourself. Which I hated at the time, of course, and I still am a little resentful, I guess. But at the same time, I was able to pay my way through college. I was the first person to graduate with a college degree. My husband and I had to pay for our own wedding we paid for the first down payment on our house. And I know to some people that that itself is a blessing, which it is. But it always felt really hard for me because I was like, why? I always had friends where their parents would help them with a bunch of stuff and they just had super supportive family and parents with financial things. I mean, with everything really, but especially financial things. But no, my husband and I had to work to get that. Like we grinded it out forever just to build us up to where we are now. And I always had that negative mindset around money too. And I have to work so hard for everything I need and it's just sometimes getting in that loop of success and that fight or flight again, I had to make sure I took care of myself because I was always felt to believe that no one was going to be there to help you fall, especially financially. That's just the impression that I always had, right? That's why my dad has never really given me anything nor have I ever felt comfortable asking my dad for anything, especially financially. There's some childhood stuff that goes deep into that, but I won't talk about it now. So, yeah, just the mindset around money, like everything around money. And every time I got caught up, I would feel like I was just barely keeping up with inflation and then all of these rising costs and it's so stupid, it really is. You just get into this rat race of things, right? And everything is more expensive now. Homes are more expensive, cars are more expensive, weddings are more expensive, babies are more expensive. Literally, college is more expensive. Literally, everything is more expensive. And I can see how you just get put on this hamster wheel, right? Living deeply in my masculine energy, keeping to want to strive and move towards more success and grinding it out and achieving the next thing and all of this stuff. It's great, don't get me wrong. I mean, I'm proud of all of the things that I've done in my life to get me where I am today because I would like to consider myself successful, especially, again, coming from nothing and where I am now, I'm not just another statistic, but at the same time, it can be so detrimental to your health, like your mental health. You just get put on that rat race and nothing's ever enough. And you're just continuing to go and you have these times of when you were bullied and you weren't enough then and you're not enough now. I mean, all of it is just so crazy, right? And the hamster will just become so toxic. Especially last year when I was at work and I hit record number and sales for me, definitely, and I think it was like the second highest even for all of the division. And I was by myself producing these numbers. I literally invested everything into working, and it just made me depressed or at least contributed to kind of that downward spiral depression that I had. Last year, I started listening to Anita on Manifesting Money, her podcast, and she talks about relationships with money and why you have these relationships with money. And listening to her, that was so helpful as I was trying to get out of this kind of cycle with finances. And in the card when I was reading it, it said, if you hear this poverty mindset comes through and your thoughts pause for a moment and ask yourself whether I can't afford it. Is the truth or limiting belief. Trust. The universe is here to support you financially, especially when you are following your calling and sole purpose. When you truly value something, you'll make it happen. And so when I read that, I was just like, okay, this is what we need to do. Between the magician card, really trying to figure out the why, figuring out the why underneath the money piece for me was so helpful in working around some of the shame that I held around money. Because you know what? I am a bougie girl. Like, I just am a material girl. And it's not even like material girl in the literal sense of I want Louis Vuitton, Gucci, all of that, but of the things that I want in life, I mean, sure, designer purse, whatever, awesome. If I get that. Lovely. Who doesn't want to? Louis Vuitton or Chanel? Like, let's be honest, or at least I don't anyway. Maybe I'm just speaking for myself, but I just want to have the money to be able to live freely and to the definition of what that means for me. And I don't want to have to stress about bills while I'm living my life. And I envision. I held shame around money for so long now that I didn't even realize I had shame around it until I was doing some really deep shadow work, like looking into my ideals about money. And I realized I shouldn't be ashamed for wanting to make money and living my best life. It's my life, and if that's what I want to do, let me do it. And if it's in a Gwagon like mind your business, I've been conditioned to believe that money is bad and money isn't bad. Money is only an energy. And if you want to use that energy for something bad, then you are making it bad. But if you want to use that energy for something good, then you are making it something good. And if you make money, you can have real impact. That's just how our world is structured right now in this moment, is money will buy things. Money will get you things. Money will provide opportunity. Money will open doors for things. Money will get you connected with other people. And I want to be able to use this to impact people, but positively. I want to be able to start accessible Stem programs, especially for little girls, especially for little black girls. I was looking for a summer Stem program for my little niece. And I'm sorry, but representation matters to a not really be able to find anything for girls specifically, but then to have it not be any girls really of color in the marketing materials that they're using. I want to be able to have programs where it's accessible and kids that need it, whether you're black, whether you're white, whether you're whatever. But if you are in a situation where your family cannot afford things, like my family could not afford things, I want that to be accessible to you. So then you can live to your best potential, be exposed to things, get to try new things. That's what life is all about. That's how we learn, that's how we understand through those types of experiences. I want to be able to use that money to buy me time so I can have more time to mentor the youth. I can have money to actually donate to environmental causes. Money talks. Money has power. And I want my power to make a big change for the wellbeing of the collective and not just myself. That's a big difference of where I held all of this money negatively. Like, oh, people only do it for bad things, blah, blah. No, I'm going to be successful. So I can help my family, I can help myself, I can help others, because there is enough for it to go around to all. I want everyone to experience abundance and happiness and peace and on a healthy and thriving planet. Thank you, Mother Nature, for everything that you do. I'm sorry that we're treating you like shit all the time. And I want my money. If I am shopping and doing those types of things, I would love to put that to smaller businesses, to really amazing artists and creators. And typically that is more expensive. But I'd rather have the money to buy from those people that are giving high quality goods instead of like shan. Not only is that bad for the planet, but it's literally so trendy and it just again, keeps you in this hamster wheel of continuously consume, consume, consume more and more. You're not enough. You don't have the best clothes, you don't have the best outfit. Whatever. Even on this trip in Mexico Lowkey, we're trying to save money. We are buying this house. So a girl is still on a budget. Even though she's manifesting money, she's still smart. But I was like, I don't have money to buy new clothes for vacation. First floor problems. I know. But typically when I go on vacation, I love to get new outfits. And this year we just can't. But I made it work. I pulled out some old dresses that I haven't worn forever. And I'm like, Whatever, I don't care anymore. I don't have a shame around wearing the same dress again and getting pictures in it multiple times. I'm just going to wear it. And I'm surprised. I never only wore one of these dresses once because it is so pretty. I was feeling myself. Even the ladies that are working at the resort, they were like, I remember you from last night. Your dress was so pretty. I'm like, thank you. In the back of my head, though, I'm like, oh, my gosh. It's like used. Yeah. Getting to support those creators, I mean, I have my own jewelry business, and I totally understand how hard it is to get that support. And it's a business where I want to make sure I'm doing things better for the planet. If we are going to consume, making it at least compostable, packaging, those types of things, and I want to be able to experience the world through travel and learning cultures. I feel like that's where I've learned the most. I'm an Aquarius. I'm a humanitarian. I need the culture. I need all the things. I need all those things. Those are the types of things that expand me, and I have to have financial means to do it. And yes, I get it. You can go backpacking. You do all those other things. But again, I am a bougie girl, okay? I've been camping twice. I need a resort. It's just what it is manifesting, okay? I need the PJ. I'm tired of flying commercial. Southwest, you've been good to me, but a PJ would be bombed, too. And of course I want to have the time and the freedom to be with my husband. The only asset that we can't get back is time. And I want to spend the rest of my life living life with my husband to the fullest, creating as many memories as possible, whether that is on a vacation or that is a picnic in our backyard. I just want to have that time with him because life is short and we never know when it's going to go. So if I can not have to worry so much about spending my energy and my time and making money in ways that don't serve me and I can do it in ways that do serve me, which is sharing wisdom with you guys, sharing my story with you guys, helping you guys, guiding you through all of these things. I mean, that's literally a dream. I'm literally sitting here recording in this hotel room, looking at my husband, looking fine. I know I keep saying that, but he is. And the beautiful jungle, and it's just like I want everyone to be able to feel how I feel right now. And that is full of gratitude and that is full of love and that is full of blessings. And a lot of that is because I have changed my mindset. And my first solo episode that I recorded earlier today was talking about how I was feeling a year ago. And trust me, what I just told you about how I'm feeling right now would not come close to how I was feeling last year. Last year was a mess. And I would love to help people get to a place like this, a place where you're happy and you can be kind to others and have empathy for others and allow others to live their most authentic lives, because you are living your most authentic life. And I want to use all of this time wisely, spend it with my family, good friends. Good friends, and potentially one day, my own family. Money has been scary for me around having kids that financial, like, I will say burden because that's how it's felt before. Obviously, I'm changing my mindset around a lot of the ways that I speak to myself about money now. But that financial burden of having a kid, and it's like, no, we're going to make this work and we're going to create a life for ourselves that we feel like we are worthy of and that our kids are worthy of. Because, again, I came from nothing and I know what that feels like. And I don't want my kids to have that same kind of struggle. At least take that one small piece off of their plate. Trust me, I will not have spoiled children. They will learn. Just like my daddy said, no allowance. Because why would I pay you to do things that you should be doing anyway? Like, that kind of energy to them, you have to work for things, but at least in balance, at least there's no fear around. Like, oh my gosh, we're not getting this because we don't have it and we can't have it. And it's scary. It's, oh, I can't have this because I need to earn it type energy. And the last piece of that little quote from the Five of Pentacles card was something that really called my husband and he said he liked, when you truly value something, you'll make it happen. And again, I'm sitting here talking about my why, thinking about my why, pulled the card to help guide me. I also did a Y exercise, which I'm going to record a more in depth episode of doing the Y exercise. But. Essentially, I did two y's. One of the whys was what is my why for doing this podcast and like, what is my overall kind of why. And the most amazing thing was they literally both led to love. Because love is the answer. And it's just true. If I allow that to guide me, an emotion I know I've talked about before in the past that has not naturally come to me. And now that's how I want to guide my true why through everything that I'm doing. I'm so excited. It's literally the most amazing feeling ever. The first question I said, what is your. Why? What's the exercise? Well, the first thing is I want to be rich. And the other one was, why am I doing this podcast? And both of them led to love. Those are the two things that are really being called to me as my wife is money and the reason behind doing this podcast. And both of them leads to love. That's just so amazing. I can't wait to really sit on that and process that. So that's my story kind of around why. Thank you, Kenny, for the homework assignment of let's dig in. What is magician card mean? What is it saying for my why? And then going with that why? Moving forward with your new path. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. Please share it with anybody that you feel like you are called to share this with. I would love to interact with any of you if you guys are enjoying the content because this is for building a community and giving everyone a nurturing space to feel seen and to feel loved. So I would love to hear from all of you guys. Kenny, I miss you. Shout out, Kenny. Thank you, Rachel, for babysitting my baby girl. And we will talk to you guys next week.
Kendle: Thank you for holding space for this conversation. We hope it was expansive. As a new podcast, it would mean the world if you could please help us grow our community by leaving a review view and sharing this episode.
Kelly: Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss out on any of the juicy conversations. We would love to connect with you, so follow us on TikTok Instagram and our patreon. Coming soon.